Sandra Neish
Jack Manhattan
Harvey Wallbanger
Oh, my dear Bar Flies, here I thought perhaps a Tequila Tuesday would come without news that truly made me want to do a shot. Trust the Republicans to step up to the plate and hit one out of the park, just for us. In fact, grab a Prairie Fire and down it prior to reading and have another one in reserve.
Rep Virginia Foxx of North Carolina has decided to toe that good ole Republican line of FEAR. That’s right, America, you should be AFRAID! Only the Republicans can save us! Oh, help! Get the duct tape and the plastic wrap and your tin foil hats, cause we need to be skeered!
Evidently, Rep Foxx is shouting from the mountain-top that America should be terrified of the healthcare bill. Oh, and the bill is scarier than the…wait for it…TERRORISTS! Oh, no! Threat alert should be raised from “elevated” to “kiss your ass goodbye!” Healthcare?!? My God, that has to be the most scariest thing in the whole universe! Especially since it was brought to us by the Democrats! I mean, Democrats are twenty gazillion times scarier than Osama bin Laden, Sadaam Hussein and Hitler combined! They should all be locked up! Kept in Alcatraz, far away from society so the sane, gentle, peace-loving Republicans can keep us free and safe.
Now that our lesson in sarcasm is over, Bar Flies, down to business. SERIOUSLY?!? We should be more scared of getting public option healthcare than terrorism? Oh, and apparently, our freedom comes from Congress according to Rep Foxx. Has she read that little thing we have in America? You know the one. Sure, you do. You’re a Bar Fly, you know this one. That’s right. The CONSTITUTION! That is what gives us our freedom, not the schmucks on Capitol Hill!
I guess all the Republicans want the popularity enjoyed by Sarah Palin. I hate to inform them that most of the country was laughing and pointing, not really looking at her as a serious, well, anything. Personally, I think that Senator McCain should be censured for bringing Palin into the national spotlight. Now, Rep Foxx is trying to get some exposure and sound like she cares. Has anyone heard of her before now? Outside of North Carolina, I mean?
Also, now that Americans aren’t terrified a terrorist is going to pop out from behind every bush and yell “BOO!” at them on a regular basis, the Republicans are losing a key way to garner votes: by scaring the shit out of the public and having them vote against the terrorists on election day. Healthcare is the new terrorism. If Americans aren’t afraid, the Republicans don’t think they stand a chance.
How about the issues? Last I checked, President Obama became President Obama by using hope. I know it’s a radical concept. Hope. What happened to scaring people into voting for you? Oh, yeah, that was the McCain/Palin strategy. Didn’t work so good, huh?
America isn’t being dumbed down just by entertainment news, we’re being dumbed down by entertainment politicians. Elected officials are now concerned with how popular they are. It wouldn’t surprise me if Paris Hilton gave daily classes on the Hill in branding yourself. (Hey, no matter what you think of her, she is good at branding). These are our elected representatives. They are supposed to be listening to their constituents, not scaring the bejeezus out of them!
Representatives are supposed to represent us! They aren’t supposed to be trying for camera time! Try educating us about issues you think we may not know about. Educate, not scare. Tell us your concerns in language that doesn’t make us run for the hills. Explain it, don’t turn into Chicken Little and tell us the sky is frickin’ falling!
If the sky is falling, I won’t feel it. I’ve got a whole lineup of Prairie Fire and plan to burn off all my tastebuds in hopes of burning the terror-talk out of my brain. I suggest you join me.
